Don’t put that there! Writing Believable Sex in Fiction.

Sex. The ultimate taboo subject. Unless you’re strolling through the Red Light District or down the streets of ancient Rome, just talking about it openly is bound to get you a few gasps or awkward stares. It’s the one thing that everyone does, but no one wants to talk about. Sex in fiction writing is something that has taken many authors years to perfect yet it’s something that can be mastered in seconds. All you need to do is kick your inhibitions, relax and just let yourself be creative. Once you begin to understand the basics, like with any other form of writing, it’s stuck with you for life. It’s like riding a bike, with the exception that, even the clumsiest people can write it. Some think of sex writing as seasoning, that final ingredient added to make your works of fiction pop. To others it’s the main course. But no matter who you are or what type of fiction you write, whether its innocent, harlequin romances, steamy paranormal encounters or flat out smut; there should always be a method to your madness. I’m not an expert by any means on writing anything, but just like my previous post on Point of View, I want to share what I know and what I’ve learned throughout the years about writing believable sex in fiction. And enjoying it too.

This is not a comprehensive guide on writing the BEST sex scenes in the world. This blog post is geared for those of you out there who are having trouble getting started writing sex at all. Blog post after the sexiness.

Taecyeon get out from in front of Junho or I will rape you both.


But I’m a virgin! I’m afraid my inexperience will reflect on my characters!

Well, unless you’re so virginal you’ve never had a wet dream I’m pretty sure the presence of a hymen has absolutely nothing to do with writing about sex. Just like reading about sex, it’s all about fantasy. And I’m sure anyone remotely old enough to be reading this blog post has had some sort of fantasy at some point in life. Just think about it, whether it involves gentle caresses and teasing butterfly kisses, or hardcore, gagged, bound and covered in candle wax fucking; It’s fantasy! Your imagination is what fuels your writing and without it your writing would be as dull as that phone manual you ditched the moment you bought your new cellphone. Don’t pretend you read the manual! And if you don’t believe me, just think about it. There was once a time where sex was even more taboo than it is now. The first women to write romance novels were more than likely virginal. I’m as untouched as they come but I’ve been known to write panty dropping, seat wetting sex. When it comes down to it, it’s all about how comfortable you are with not only yourself, but writing about something most of the world is uncomfortable with.

But I AM uncomfortable! All those bad words! I just can’t imagine myself saying the word di—

Then DON’T SAY IT! I can’t say the ‘D’ word either and it doesn’t make my sex scenes any less pleasing. One of the biggest parts of sex writing is finding your comfort zone and sticking with it. Not everyone can lay down the colorful, porno-esque language and make it believable. If you don’t know your comfort zone here’s an easy way to find it; Go to your bookshelf or wherever you hide your romance novels from the rest of your family, and pull out that erotica your cousin gave you as a gag gift last year. Open it up and read it. Do you cringe at the word cock? When the author uses the word jizz do you want to vomit? Well I do, so put that book back and find something that doesn’t scream 80’s pornography okay? Look at that Harlequin romance. Does his pulsating member make you laugh instead of turn you on? You wouldn’t be alone dear. When the author talks about heaving bosoms do you giggle uncontrollably? Me too! It’s not in your comfort zone, and be it too hard or too soft for your liking you’re not going to pull off a believable sex scene if you’re laughing at your lead male or gagging every other word. So find a comfortable medium. Pick up a thesaurus and practice writing down or typing out those naughty words. Find the ones that you can bare reading and keep hold of them, you’ll need them later.

I don’t know HOW to write sex okay? I’ve had fantasies…wet dreams and what not, but I just can’t seem to get that secret formula down pact!

There IS no secret formula. Writing sex is just like writing any other scene in your story. It has to fit in order to be believable. Some authors liken it to writing fight scenes, and if you think about it, they are very similar. You can’t just throw in a random sex scene, or fight scene, and have it work itself out.

  • Ricky sat across from Adelaide, watching as she nervously crossed and uncrossed her legs. She was waiting patiently for him to make the first move and he’d gladly oblige her if it wasn’t for her bastard mate sitting beside her. He could smell her arousal from where he sat, and there wasn’t any doubt he could smell it too. His nostrils flared and he was about to growl in frustration when a large muscular man in a diaper burst through the window wielding a sword.
  • “Get up Ricky! It’s time to do battle.”

 That ending was painful to write. Just as painful as it was to read no doubt. The point I’m trying to make is, don’t treat your sex scenes like sex scenes. Treat them like any other scene in your book. They need to have a reason to be there. They need to have the basic structure that all works of fiction have; a beginning, a middle and a climax. Pun very much intended. Your characters shouldn’t be two strangers standing in the middle of a field in one scene and in the very next be falling into bed together. We need to know why they care about each other enough to sleep with each other, or why they don’t care at all and just want to fuck each other senseless. There needs to be build up!

Okay so I get it, writing sex shouldn’t be some big whoopdiedoo! It’s just sex, just write it as comfortably as you can. Sure, but what does a good sex scene look like?

 Aish. What a question. A good sex scene, like anything else that can be based on opinion, is really up to you and your readers. There are many different types of sex scenes, find which kind you like to write about, and write about them. For me, I’m a mixture of romantic sex scenes and flat out smut bordering on the pornographic. Yet, there are certain words I can and can’t use. For example, when describing the male genitalia, I use the word cock. I hate the ‘D’ word, and penis is entirely too technical for me. When describing the female genitalia…I DON’T describe the female genitalia. I make references to it, but I rely on your imagination to fill in all the really dirty facts, but I try to make it believable enough that you won’t have to substitute the entire scene with something else. Writing sex also depends on who you’re writing it for. I write mostly for people my age and older. I write for housewives and anyone else who reads paranormal romantic fiction.


  • Excerpt from Taming the Leviathan due out later this year.
  • “Stop teasing me.” She breathed, gasping again as he tugged at the pink fabric with his teeth. Leviathan wasted no time in ridding her of the hideous khaki’s, rubbing his whiskered cheek against her thigh as he breathed her in. She smelled like honey, deliciously sweet, her scent going straight to his brain until he was drunk with it. Her mouth dropped open in a silent pant as he tugged at her panties, pulling them over her thighs and down her legs, leaving her completely bare to him. She shuddered as he teased her with the tips of his fingers, and when he took her into his mouth she thought she’d die from the sheer amount of pleasure it brought her.
  • Leviathan licked, played and teased, tugging gently on her tender folds until she couldn’t keep still beneath him, her back arching as she slipped her fingers into his hair and tugged. She was vocal, just as he’d imagined her to be, her puffs and pants and moans growing in volume by the second. He loved the sound of her pleasure, each groan making him harder and harder until he was straining against his zipper. He had to have her yet at the same time he was terrified of hurting her. The power it took to love her slowly caused him to shake, his muscles straining as he held himself back. “Oh god Leviathan.” She moaned his name and coupled with the sweet taste of her it was nearly his undoing. He slid up her body and she wrapped her arms around his torso, accepting him, craving him, as she almost demanded he satisfy her. And he had no problem complying.
  • “You’re going to be the death of me.” He growled against her lips and she chuckled, a deep throaty sound that had him gripping her throat, squeezing gently as he nipped at her ear. “Something funny?” He reached between them to free himself, guiding his swollen cock to her entrance. Kailani couldn’t control herself as she arched her hips towards him, trying to force him inside of her. She needed him. She didn’t want to wait any longer.
  • “No, nothing’s funny.” She panted and it was his turn to laugh. Leviathan eased himself inside of her and her mouth dropped open in a silent scream, her eyes clenching shut as she dug her nails into his ribs. Kailani suddenly couldn’t breathe as he stretched her to the limit. She felt as if she would shatter beneath him at any second. Leviathan buried his face against her throat as he ground himself against her, a gentle rocking motion that was meant to tease and not satisfy. She whimpered, her nails scoring his sides and leaving welts behind but he didn’t care, he was far too intent on torturing her. “You are an asshole!” She exclaimed as she rocked her hips in an attempt to take him deeper but he wasn’t having that, his powerful hands holding her as still as possible.
  • “I told you you’d be sick of me.” He chuckled, rolling onto his back and once again pulling her on top of him. “Ride.” He growled at her and she wasted no time in guiding him back inside of her.  

 Some of you may be cringing in disgust but for me, that’s the perfect mixture of quasi virginal sex and kink. Here’s another example.

           Excerpt from Werewolves are Diabolical which can be found on

  • “You have no idea what you do to me Clara.” He whispered against my ear and I pushed back against him, begging him with my body to ease the ache he had started. With a chuckle he wasted no time in complying, before I knew it he was pushing inside my body, stretching me to the limit as he filled me completely. I moaned his name as he rocked his hips against me, one of his strong hands on my belly and the other one plucking my nipple until it was once again standing at rapt attention. I wanted to scream again at the sheer amount of pleasure he was giving me. Pushing me forward onto my hands he grasped my hips and pulsated into me, the more his pace increased the more frequently I gasped and shouted his name. Before I knew what was happening he was pounding into me, my face buried in the grass as I held on to the earth for dear life. I tore up patches of grass as ribbons of white heat danced just within reach and I screamed as my orgasm rocked me, shaking me to my soul as the world shattered and exploded around us.

 Quick, sweet, and to the point. This type of writing is probably more common but it’s something I wrote before I’d found my comfort zone so it no longer does it for me. At one time it was the perfect amount of heat to get me going, now it’s just like…Okay so he put what where?

 Okay, I think I’m getting it now. So how do I go about…’getting in the mood’ to write about sex?

 How do you go about getting into the mood to have sex? Light a few candles, take a long bubble bath…hell apply nipple clamps if that’s what gets you in the mood. For me, I just fantasize. I plot out what’s going to happen in the scene in my head and if I have to replace the characters with one…or two Kpop stars to get myself going that’s what I’ll do. In the end, writing sex strictly depends on you. I can’t tell you how to do it, neither can anyone else in the world. You have to find what makes yourself tick. Now, I’ve given you the building blocks, get out there and get your characters laid. They’ll thank you for it.

3 thoughts on “Don’t put that there! Writing Believable Sex in Fiction.

  1. I would like to thnkx for the efforts you’ve put in writing this website. I’m hoping the same high-grade web site post from you in the upcoming also. Actually your creative writing abilities has inspired me to get my own web site now. Really the blogging is spreading its wings rapidly. Your write up is a great example of it.

  2. Omg,thank you for the tips!!!,Um so inexperience into writing smuy and I’ve never tried.I wanted to write but I’m not so sure.thank you so much I love you!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s